"Can I ask why you got out of that system?"
Watching him pour tea for himself with awkward movements, Hitzfeld couldn't help but ask.
Although there is a procedure within Shadow Lion that allows agents to exchange merits for retirement time, she understands that this process is rarely applied to doctors.
Because the medical gap is really too big, there is a shortage of doctors, and there is an even greater shortage of doctors who can do psychotherapy. She feels that whether it is Shadow Lion or any other supernatural organization, if they catch a doctor like this, they will not let him retire easily.
Chapter 34 Psychotherapy
Such a doctor—Hitzfeld was sure she would call Paul that.
Well...the reason why it's Paul instead of Wolfe is because the latter name reminds her of Aunt Wolfe.
As for her recognition, it was also very simple. First of all, he was definitely a smart man: when he first saw her, he called her "Gray Eyelashes" (not "One-Eyed Dragon" or any other name), which showed that he didn't know her, at least he had never seen her face, which should be highly recognizable, anywhere.
But after she mentioned "Grest", he was able to guess who she was immediately and accurately called her "Hitzfeld". This shows that he is not always indifferent to outside intelligence and has strong logical reasoning ability.
If applied to a psychiatrist, isn't this enough to prove that he is capable?
At least someone with this ability shouldn't be living in a place like this, so she was sure that there must be a reason why Paul Warfield had fallen into his current situation.
"Oh, it's not that complicated." The man raised his eyebrows, sat down opposite the sofa, and began to explain the matter to her in general.
"27 years ago, I was a talented newcomer there - don't be surprised, the newcomers in our industry are always older, there are a lot of newcomers in their s and s, I was only in my s at the time, right? It's not an exaggeration to say I was talented."
Hitzfeld nodded in agreement. The medical system required a lot of knowledge to climb up, and students of Earth medicine had to study for a longer time than those of students in other disciplines.
"I had a good career prospect, I was respected, and fate had favored me. I met someone I could spend my life with. Everything was going well." The doctor said in a very calm tone.
"But everything changed soon. Our family suffered an accident. A total of eight people died and I was the only one left. I couldn't bear the blow and fell into depression... You should know what this kind of depression means to a doctor who studies psychology and emotions."
"I don't quite understand." Hitzfeld hesitated, "but I can probably imagine it."
The reason is not difficult - just like if you want to treat baldness, you find a specialist clinic, but after entering the clinic you find out that the so-called expert himself is bald. Of course you will suspect that he is a liar.
Or even if you don't think he is a liar, you will still question his professional level.
The same thing happened to Paul. He was so upset about this matter. No matter how justifiable it was, others would think he was unprofessional.
How can you expect a psychologist who can't even control his own emotions to help you with physical therapy?
Although it is true that his situation is very miserable, isn't this the same thing facing everyone who goes to him for physical therapy?
This cannot be an excuse for downfall, so although it is cruel and may seem unreasonable, the genius doctor 27 years ago was quickly abandoned by everyone.
They did not ignore him, but instead cared about him, giving him salary and subsidies, but that was not the care Paul wanted.
He knew that he could not blame anyone and no one was really at fault in the whole thing, but after he calmed down, he still felt angry and hated the familiar environment from the bottom of his heart, so he left Wayne directly and opened a clinic in the poorest northern suburbs of Blackwood City.
"I'm telling you this for Grace's sake."
The doctor poured himself a glass of water and drank it all.
"Don't ask too many questions, okay? It's basically my own fault. From the time I was able to get in touch with Grace's potential seed to being abandoned, I can't blame anyone."
He said this and acted as if he didn't care, but it was obviously not the case.
Hitzfeld did not expose her, but instead wondered in his heart why Pusance had recommended him to this person.
She definitely knew a lot of doctors, so even if she didn't know Sixus, how could she not know him? But she just recommended Paul here.
This shows that Paul has something extraordinary, and this extraordinary quality may not be possessed by other doctors.
After a little thought, Hitzfeld thought it might have something to do with Paul finally coming through.
27 years ago... The environment 27 years ago was much worse than it is now.
At that time, the Sunflower Reverse was still causing trouble everywhere in Sara. Because of various disasters, assassinations - or even simply being affected by accidents - there were definitely many people who lost their loved ones in such situations.
Most of them were abandoned. Xia Yibing mentioned this to her several times. The reason was that there was a serious shortage of manpower at the time, and the consequences of the birth of Corrupters were too terrible. Instead of wasting too many resources on their treatment, it was better to give up directly.
According to the women's descriptions, the most extreme situations were to be shot on the spot. In many cases, the parties even begged others to shoot them. This can only be described as a helpless act under the background of the times.
This was probably the reason why Paul was abandoned - not only were there doubts about his business ability, they were also worried that he would become corrupt.
Maybe someone had been watching him during that time, and if he showed any sign of abnormality, they would break in and shoot him to death.
This is normal... that was the sudden death of the whole family + the loss of a loved one. If Paul was younger, he wouldn't be so guarded, but he is already an adult, his spirit has been formed, and the probability of him being corrupted is much higher!
But he did not fall in the end.
He got through it, although he still seems to have not gotten over it. He still complains about Shadow Lion, Grace, and even himself.
But he did not fall after all.
Without relying on anyone's help, he simply hid away to heal his wounds by himself. Until now, he still looks like a normal person. He can speak and analyze in an orderly manner, and use the knowledge he has mastered to support himself.
Compared to many people who are unable to extricate themselves from sadness and pain, this is really rare.
How did he do this?
Hitzfeld felt that this was why Prissy had asked her to come here.
"Really? He thinks I can help you in this regard..."
After hearing the girl's simple statement of purpose, the doctor frowned and fell into deep thought.
"Let's confirm something first, Hitzfeld," he said. "Yes, I didn't remember you at first, but I knew you were related to them, and your features were so obvious that I knew you were the detective..."
"Let's confirm one thing first - are you willing to tell me about your troubles during this period?"
"Don't rush to answer." He raised a hand. "When I say 'tell me', I mean 100%. Nothing is left out of me."
"I don't want to," Hitzfeld said.
Of course she doesn't want to.
She hadn't even told Xia what was going on behind the scenes, so why should she tell a stranger?
Just because he is a so-called doctor?
To be frank, Hitzfeld didn't think this skill was a big deal. The so-called physical therapy involved operations - such as dream entry and hypnosis, which she had seen from Pusance. She was sure that they were of no use to her.
"So how much are you willing to tell me?"
"About 70%... No, closer to 90%."
"It seems you are deeply troubled."
"……Why do you say that?"
"Because that's 90%!" Paul said with emotion, "90%! It means that what you are willing to tell me is no different from the truth! That tiny difference of only 10% will play a decisive role, it must be important! It must have a profound impact on you!"
“I don’t see the connection.”
"It doesn't matter. Let me give you an example. Some people in real life are unhappy. Maybe the milk they received in the morning was broken, the newspaper they received was torn, their wallet fell on the road, they were fired on the way to work, they were bitten by a dog on the way back, and so on. One or two of these things on a person is enough to make them unhappy for several days, but only when they accumulate enough, I mean, they all flood into your life, will your mental string be unable to bear the weight, it will be crushed and fall into a state of depression."
“I think I understand part of it…”
"This is the reality." Paul spread his hands. "The human heart is very strong. It has a strong ability to correct and recover. It ensures that you remain emotionally stable. Generally speaking, only a series of blows can destroy a person's inner world in a short period of time, just like me--"
He touched his chest and said, "I lost so many important people, and this is why I ended up like this."
"If I were in your position and asked that question, if I didn't want him to guess the situation, I would have to hide the deaths of many people. The content I would eventually admit and choose to reveal to him would probably only account for 1-2% of the truth."
"But you, Hitzfeld—"
He paused.
"Just 'one percent' is enough for Grace to suggest you come to me..."
"I don't want to lie to you. I'm afraid there's nothing I can do about this."
Chapter 35: A New Look in the Cabinet
Next, Paul began to explain his theory in detail.
He said: He believes that the inner world of human beings is strong enough and does not need excessive guidance and treatment in many cases. The reason why many people are too fragile is that they fail to find the right method, that is, they usually cannot find their own advantages.
"Like you and me." Paul pointed at the girl and himself. "I'm a man, you're a woman. If I were a psychopath - I mean if, I might be jealous of your beauty."
"..." Hitzfeld moved his cheeks and had nothing to say.
"I'm jealous of your beauty, but I obviously can't make myself prettier than you. I can't do that!" Paul spread his hands again, "Then if I'm too perverted and too obsessed with this matter, will I be unable to recover?"
"Well... I can't imagine that kind of scene..."
"I mean hypothetically! Hypothetically!!"
"Okay then...assuming so."
"So I must find something else to divert my attention!" Paul clapped his hands vigorously, stood up suddenly, and raised his hand to the girl, "You get up too!!"
Hitzfeld sighed and stood up to act with him.
"What did you find?" the doctor asked loudly.
"Nothing found."
"I'm serious Hitzfeld."
"Oh, then I realize you are a man and I am a woman."
"Not only that!" Paul clapped his hands again, scaring Lily who was lying next to him. "You should have noticed that I'm taller than you!!!"
"..." Hitzfeld was speechless again, and then she reacted, "You mean, the you in the hypothetical case, I mean the psychopath, can establish a psychological advantage from the fact that 'you are taller than me'?"
"You are indeed an excellent detective." Paul clapped his hands at her. "That's about what I mean. Now let's try a different method of comparison."
"You..." He pointed at Kurumi behind him, "It's obvious now that I'm much taller than you! You're just a shorty in front of me! Suppose you're very concerned about your height and even feel deeply affected by it, how can you divert your attention?"
Hitzfeld looked at Paul and then at Walnut and found that the height difference between them was very obvious.
Paul is over 180 cm tall, probably closer to 185 cm, and Walnut is even shorter than her. The doctor is a giant to Walnut.
"Uh..." Kurumi obviously didn't expect to be dragged into the topic, and turned to look at Hitzfeld.
The girl nodded to her, and she became excited. Under Paul's surprised gaze, she bent down, picked up a horseshoe from the ground, and easily twisted it into a twist.
Hitzfeld paid special attention to the doctor's expression and was sure that his eyes were about to pop out of their sockets.
"Obviously, I'm stronger than you~"
Hu Tao threw the twisted dough to the side, and it drew a parabola and disappeared into the darkness, making a loud clanging sound.
"As long as I'm stronger than you, your height is useless to me. If I cut you in half, you'll be the same size as me..."
"Stop!" Paul raised his hand to stop her. "We are just giving examples! Do you understand giving examples? It means assuming something that does not exist in reality. We don't have to take it too seriously..."
Hitzfeld turned his head to the side, using his hair to hide his smile.
She wasn't sure what Priscilla had meant by that, but she had gotten one thing right in her letter: it was pleasant to talk to Paul Warfield.
"Well, Dr. Warfield," she said, "I think I know what your secret is."
That is probably - no matter how sad and desperate the environment is, don't forget to find your own strengths or shining points, build psychological advantages around these strengths, and make sure that you are still a good person.
This way, you will have a greater chance of being able to hold on, you will be more optimistic emotionally, and your heart will be more resilient.
In fact, to put it bluntly, it is a method of spiritual victory. I may not be as good as you in this aspect, but I can always find a way where I am better than you.
Well... Although it is a bit inappropriate to say this, she remembered the famous xx comparison method in her previous life.
Einstein didn’t know about the theory of relativity until he was an adult, but I knew it when I was 6 years old!
Conclusion: I am better than Einstein!
It sounds stupid, and it may be stupid, but you have to admit that this method is really useful when you have no other choice.
It's better to be a happy and simple person than to commit suicide because of depression.
Perhaps this is what it means to be wise yet appear foolish?
After saying goodbye to the doctor with Walnut and Lily, Hitzfeld paid the consultation fee, but was stopped again when he was about to leave.
"I'm not sure my method will work for you." Paul was a little embarrassed at this time. "I told this to other people, but they all thought that there was something wrong with me."
He tapped his temple.
"And you...I took your money after all."
"So I have to remind you, or at least warn you - you'd better try my method."
"I can tell a person's mental state. Your current situation is indeed not very good."
