She was just a memory, just a thought left over from Mansoura-Laurel-Vera-Hitzfeld.
Meeting across time and space is a miracle.
The embrace that transcends life and death is a miracle.
But that was her limit.
She can no longer offer advice to her children as Kardashian does, she can no longer knit sweaters, and she can no longer prepare birthday gifts for her under anyone's name.
In order to do all this, she exhausted all her waiting, thinking that maybe one day they would meet again and she would be able to hug her in this way again, deceiving herself into thinking that this was compensation, and she also imprinted this memory.
This is a deep regret and pain.
If it was the real Mansoura-Laurel-Vera-Hitzfeld, her proud heart would certainly not want to admit it.
But am I really her?
I am her...and not her...
I inherited her regrets and pain, but not her strength.
Perhaps time washed away this strength, or perhaps she never thought about being herself when she was imprinting her memories.
This is love reserved for that person alone.
No other ingredients are mixed in.
Love so rich that it seems to overflow.
"I……"
Hitzfeld froze completely.
Her whole body tensed up, feeling this embrace that transcended time and space, as well as life and death, and the woman's soft call echoed in her ears. His expression twisted little by little, and finally he turned his hand and hugged her tightly.
Closing her eyes, she understood everything completely.
Yongche Ice Lake, the frozen truth.
Time, memory, flesh and blood, reality.
The latecomer awakened her because of his love for the child, which was a tragedy and fate. It meant that this hug was not luck at all, not a coincidence, and not a secret gift from the goddess of luck.
The latecomer is destined to awaken her out of love, and the secret of the Arctic is destined to be discovered by the only remaining keeper.
This is destined.
They were destined to meet here, destined to have this hug.
She was also destined to say those two sentences to her.
"I'm here."
"……Mother."
Chapter 54: Latadia Roundabout (Two in One)
After hugging each other with all their might, the two separated and looked at each other's faces, each revealing a somewhat silly smile.
"Tell me about your experience?"
This woman, who is silly but a little experienced, can be called "Laurel". She is not thinking too much at the moment, such as whether she can be considered a substitute for someone.
She only knew that this was the meaning of her existence. Everything she had, her emotions, the memories and powers she was given were all for this.
Hitzfeld naturally wouldn't refuse her.
At first, the girl was a little hesitant. On the one hand, it was because some things happened a long time ago, and it was not easy to describe all the details. On the other hand, she was not used to having such a long conversation, especially with her mother.
"I didn't know anything at first... I became like this after I woke up... Mrs. Glee took me in... We lived at No. 12 Flo Street... Oh, by the way, Flo Street is in Blackwood City, and the location of Blackwood City on Earth should be..."
"Madam taught me a lot. Xia and I defeated the God of Golem together. When she was leaving, I found out that the ink had also had a certain effect on her. Her feelings for me deteriorated under this influence. I wasn't even sure if this could be considered love at the time."
"Besides her, there are Ethan and the others. Later, I met Maps Darent... He is a hateful guy, but very reliable at critical moments."
"We have broken the curse of gold."
"I once went out to sea with the Golden Knight to explore the Man-Eating Island."
“Uncover the mystery of dragons in a fairytale setting.”
There were too many things... Hitzfeld had too many things he wanted to tell her. No matter how long ago something happened, she tried to recall every detail. This was because she knew in her heart that this was not only the only chance for her, but also for Laurel.
Her speaking speed became faster and faster, from stumbling at the beginning to fluent, and finally switching from the Sara language she was already accustomed to back to English and Chinese - she always believed that language has the ability to sort out logic, and speaking these words in a familiar language can bring the two people's hearts closer.
"Speak slowly."
The girl choked on her saliva, and Laurel hugged her again and gently stroked her back, "It sounds like such a thrilling story... It's amazing, Aisuen is now a real savior~"
"I don't think this is a good thing, Mom." Hitzfeld frowned slightly, "Does a civilization that needs a savior really have a future..."
This was also one of the concerns weighing on her heart. She had never bothered to reveal it to anyone, not even Xia Yibing. This was because she felt that they had received different educations in their childhood, and Xia might not agree with her ideas.
That is the idea that "saviors are unreliable". This is related to the country and city where she grew up. She always feels that saviors are important, but they themselves are synonymous with miracles. A civilization or a nation may be able to count on heroes to stand up in times of crisis, but if they have to count on such low-probability events every time they encounter a crisis, it is likely that they will not go far.
Because that means that every time a hero appeared before, he failed to fundamentally improve the predicament it faced, and it fell into an extremely terrible cycle. This cycle will continue forever like a millstone, but civilization and nation cannot guarantee that someone will stand up every time.
If this idea were told to Xia Yibing, Hitzfeld felt that the woman would most likely be confused.
Compared to her, Xia is more realistic. Maybe in her opinion, thinking about such things is meaningless. She will definitely say that it is good enough to be alive. If it is really impossible, let me be the hero.
She was just that kind of person. Even though she was deeply tortured by her childhood, she would not let down her guard when she really needed to be strong. Hitzfeld admired this side of her very much, so he didn't want to argue with her on this point.
Or maybe it wasn't an argument, it should be said... Hitzfeld had seen more advanced technology and more advanced civilizations, but even the Earth with all these was still so powerless when facing "Them". Of course she would wonder... whether Namibia's civilization could save itself if it continued to develop.
She thinks further ahead and wonders how the world will work after she dies.
And she had never been able to tell anyone about these worries, not even to the Blood Crystal Crow, because Ms. Yusilian had never been to Earth and might not understand her thoughts.
Only Laurel, and perhaps Coldis, would say this to Hitzfeld.
"Poor little thing, do you want to tire yourself to death?" Laurel couldn't help laughing.
She hugged her daughter tightly again, and rocked her in a funny way, "You are already the savior in the true sense... You have perfectly carried the hope that His Majesty had placed on the Secret Keeper family. You are now hope itself. You have done everything to the best of your ability."
"In this situation, you even worry about the world after your death. What's wrong with you? Do you want to be a saint?"
"I'm not..." Hitzfeld closed his eyes and sniffed the sweet scent of Laurel, "but I am already a Namiyan."
Hope? Or fate? This is the only point Hitzfeld does not agree with fatalism.
Laurel and Kardashian both said that the fate of the Secret Keeper family had already been determined, but it was really hard for her to attribute all the people and things she encountered along the way to fate.
Maybe it was fate that I came to Namibia, that I was destined to face off with Coldis with a gun, and that I was destined to hug my mother in the Arctic, but what about Mrs. Glee? What about Ethan? What about Xia? What about Darent?
There are also Torres, Cybertron... Carl... Leon... Bariu... Erwin.
Is this also destiny?
She doesn't think so.
Maybe meeting is fate, but the story after meeting is definitely not fate. Fate can only make two parallel lines intersect, but whether the lines separate again or get entangled after the intersection is something that even God cannot control.
That's why she thought about these things - she chose to integrate into Sarah because of these non-fateful factors. She has already cared too much about this world, how can she watch it collapse after her death?
"This kind of thought is worth my hiding everything from you in the beginning..."
Laurel kissed her on the forehead.
“Awesome!”
"As expected of my daughter."
"Before, I was still worried about how to bring up some things with you, and whether you would be willing to accept them after I brought them up. But now it seems that my worries were in vain, and you definitely have the qualifications."
"qualifications……?"
The girl stopped rubbing her face against her and looked up for an answer.
"We left that specially for you." Laurel raised her eyebrows and smiled at her.
"The qualifications to become a god."
Seeing her daughter's pupils shrink drastically with satisfaction, Laurel felt really proud at this moment.
She felt that "she" was really amazing. Not only had she calculated and arranged everything, she even prepared a "long stairway to godhood" for her daughter.
"As you can see, I am just a memory at this moment."
Hearing this, Hitzfeld's eyes dimmed noticeably.
"You have guessed my fate...Without a physical body as a carrier, it is impossible for the spirit to float freely in this world. The countless branches of the tree will extend into the void from the place of origin. There are many visitors from other dimensions like me. We are all its food."
"It ate you...?"
Hitzfeld gradually frowned.
She became depressed after the Crown case because she could not balance morality and her inner expectations.
Considering the long-standing moral standards, she should take the initiative to reveal all the information to Sarah and actively cooperate with them to kill the mother tree, delaying the arrival of the disaster again.
But it is because it is judged that Laurel and the mother tree have merged, she has become a part of the mother tree. In a sense, the mother tree is Laurel, her mother.
So how could she make a decision? She also had a selfish side. She had already "sacrificed her relatives for the greater good" once. That time she awakened her spirit and inherited the dead bone ice needle. She hated her weakness at that time and she couldn't change anything. But now she is at least stronger than she was then. She wants to try to use her own way... to get a relatively win-win result.
This is difficult. Very difficult.
To do this, she must have absolute power.
Just imagine, if Aisuen Hitzfell was a god, even a more powerful god than the Mechanical Sun Goddess and the Sun King Aimen-Haven, who could scare away all the gray fog evil gods with just a glance, would all this still be a problem?
Definitely not... Then she naturally does not need to be tested by morality. I'm afraid that by then her will will be morality. At least many people really think so.
But it's hard.
Becoming a god is difficult, and the moral test is even more difficult.
She had to face the cruelest reality: if this willful choice ultimately failed to achieve the result she wanted, she would most likely become the sinner of Namibia.
Her previous achievements?
Useless.
The person she rescued before?
It's nothing before the world-destroying crisis.
If that happens, she will inevitably follow in Lengdis's footsteps, and the meaning of her existence will be lost. At that time, she might really have to consider whether suicide is enough to atone for her sins.
However, all this must be based on a premise: the Mother Tree does contain the concept of Laurel.
Only in this way is it worth Hitzfeld's effort to fight for it.
"Don't think too much." Laurel touched her head from behind, "This is also a kind of fusion."
"It is precisely because of this fusion—the swallowed soul can still exist in the outside world in this form, even if it is just a trace of memory—that the miracle was created. I was able to gain the authority to open it and send you in."
"...The place of origin?" Hitzfeld asked tentatively.
"That's right." Laurel let go of her, took two steps back and looked up at the sky.
"This lake wasn't just once at the equator."
"It is one of the two intersections of the Ring of Fire. The sword marks of Victoria and the Sun King overlap here to form a cross. The extremely high temperature destroyed everything here. Even if the disaster has been smoothed out over the past few hundred years, the plants that continue to grow here will be affected."
"The intersection of the two circular sword marks is now the North Pole and the South Pole."
“These are the two most perfect poles, and there is a connection between them… There is an invisible road between them, and only they can carry this road. If you follow this road, you will reach the origin.”
It sounds like it's taking me to the center of the earth.
Hitzfeld looked strange.
Mom has thought so carefully.
She was... a little unprepared.
"Your mind is definitely strong enough to support you to go in and take a look. I am only worried that your spiritual strength is not enough."
Laurel sighed, then came over and held her in her arms and rubbed her hard.
"My poor little Aisuen..."
"That eye has brought too much of a burden to you. Your spirituality is far from what it should be..."
Hitzfeld understood completely: Laurel had prepared a way for her to go to the Land of Origin. To take this road, one must not only have enough awareness, otherwise there is a high probability of failure and death, but it also has a more hardcore basic requirement - the person entering must have a strong spiritual power.
