Chapter 302 Yan Min still has so many tricks!
Qi Long packed his bags and boarded an international flight to Britain with his assistant Xiao Chi. They arrived at the B&B at around four in the morning.
From Yan Min, Qi Long learned that Dongqiang would get up at five o'clock every morning to go out for a run, and run to a spacious place to do bodyweight training. Qi Long took the opportunity when Dongqiang went out for exercise to run into the B&B.
The tour group had limited funds, and the homestay Dong Qiang booked was far from the city and relatively small, so he lived alone in the stairwell at the bottom of the stairs. Qi Long took out all his clothes, threw them into the basin, and started washing clothes!
Before rushing for Dongqiang to come back, she hung the clothes on the balcony without wringing them, and then ran to the director's car to wait for Gao Dongqiang to come back.
Dongqiang returned to the B&B wearing a sports vest and shorts. Just as he was about to take clothes from the box and go to the public bathroom to take a shower and change, he found that all his clothes were gone.
He subconsciously thought it was a prank by the program crew. Yan Min's programs loved to stir up trouble, and he had experienced it in the past few days.
Since the day we were suddenly taken to the airport to start our trip, the program crew has been constantly making trouble.
Including but not limited to the quarrel between the two sisters directed by Yan Min, which put him in a dilemma;
During a free trip to visit tourist attractions, the production team took a member away for an interview, causing the other members to think that the person was missing;
He bet on a game with the members. If they won, the production team would pay the bill. If they lost, the members would use the funds to treat someone from the director team to a meal, causing them to spend more money, etc.
This makes the already limited funds even more scarce.
In order to save money, Dongqiang spent every penny carefully these days. He would choose a B&B for the night as soon as he opened his eyes every day. Others would travel while he would find a bench to choose a B&B.
When eating, I rarely order expensive food, and I just ask the sisters to do it.
He would wait until the supermarket was about to close to buy some discounted vegetables and eggs, then cook them himself at the B&B, adding some vinegar, salt and black pepper.
"Do you think that since you suddenly attacked and took me to the airport, I should buy clothes during my trip, and if I didn't buy any, you took all my clothes away?" Dong Qiang asked with a look of anger and laughter.
Seeing that the staff ignored him, Dongqiang could only find clothes in the room by himself. He couldn't go out wearing only a sports vest and shorts, right?
As he looked around, he saw the wet clothes hanging on the balcony. After seeing this scene, Dong Qiang turned around and walked towards the director team outside the door, looking aggressive and murderous.
"Which Deyun Club actor is here? Come out, no one except the grandson of Deyun Club can do this!" Dong Qiang pointed at the director team and shouted.
All the staff members burst into laughter. Their guess was really accurate. It showed that they must have had such prank experiences before, so Dongqiang was so sure!
"How can you say that your uncle is your grandson?" Qi Long rolled down the car window and laughed.
Dong Qiang saw that it was Qi Long, so he didn't need to be polite anymore. He went up to open the car door and pulled Qi Long down: "You must blow dry your hair with a hair dryer today, or I will kill you!"
"Ouch, I'm wrong, it's okay, I've looked at the itinerary, I have to stay in Britain for two days, so I'll dry it today," Qi Long begged.
Dong Qiang pinched the back of Qi Long's neck: "What should I wear today?"
"I've brought your clothes. They're in my suitcase, locked. If you don't want them, forget it."
Dong Qiang immediately let go and patted Qi Long on the shoulder: "Good brother!"
"You change your expression too quickly, don't you?"
"We are in a foreign country, let's show our traditional Chinese culture, face changing!"
Qi Long raised his foot and kicked him: "How fresh!"
Taking out the suitcase, the gently rolled-up coat immediately caught Dongqiang's attention. It was obviously theirs: "What does this mean?"
"Oh, tonight, at the Royal Academy of Arts Performance Hall, Qi Long and Dong Qiang will be performing a special crosstalk show from overseas!"
"Fuck you!" Dongqiang was stunned on the spot. The performance couldn't be so sudden, right?
Qi Long laughed: "It's not a special show, it's just a gathering of international students. They have their own program, let's go up and perform two crosstalks!"
"Oh, so we have to stay in this city for two nights. I was saying there's nothing to see in this big city."
The main reason is that it costs money to go around in big cities, but less money to go to natural scenic spots. Dongqiang also learned to save money in just one week as a tour guide.
He learned many of his money-saving tips from Qi Long. At that time, Qi Long had just dropped out of college and was too embarrassed to ask his family for money. He learned a lot of money-saving tips while performing crosstalk as his main job and running around working part-time.
Dong Qiang almost never intervened, except for one time, when he saw Qi Long eating instant noodles to save money. As a native of Shanxi Province, he simply couldn't stand it!
In his opinion, hand-rolled noodles are better than machine-made noodles, better than instant noodles, better than going hungry, and better than dried noodles. As a person from Shanxi province, he would rather go hungry than accept dried noodles. Noodles that have no taste at all, can that be called noodles?
Therefore, Dongqiang would never touch the idea of saving money by eating instant noodles. He only learned this by buying discounted vegetables before getting off work!
After the two of them made a fuss for a while, the four older sisters and Meng Ziyi woke up, and they were all happy to see Qi Long coming.
"Oh, Qi Long is here. Finally there's someone who can help Dongqiang. I feel so sorry for him running around for us!" Cai Ming said with emotion.
Qi Long heard from Dong Qiang that the four older sisters, including Wang Lin who often played the sarcastic character in film and television dramas, were all quite easy to talk to. They would not bother Dong Qiang with everything they could do, and Meng Ziyi would often lend a hand, so it was not that tiring.
The only thing is that all the suitcases were moved by Dongqiang, and the others were just responsible for making sure the suitcases didn't move away.
He treated moving the suitcases as exercise and enjoyed it.
Qi Long walked up to her and said, "Aunt Cai, we have to hug each other. A crosstalk performer must know how to hug the dish name!"
"Hahahahahaha!" Cai Ming laughed and hugged this junior.
He knew Teacher Cai before, he knew the master. He was just a child at that time, and now he has his own apprentice.
Qi Long was not very familiar with the other three, so Dong Qiang introduced them one by one, and Qi Long greeted them politely.
There is no need for Meng Ziyi, as she has already recorded it when filming a variety show.
This girl is just like Dongqiang, the rich second generation. This trip is like "The Metamorphosis". She could still act a little pretentiously before, but she dared not to in front of several seniors. She can only have fun during the free travel.
We all went to a nearby place for breakfast, and then took a bus to visit London's attractions, mainly the Thames River and the London Eye.
As a person whose memory has been enhanced by magical software, Qi Long directly acted as a tour guide, explaining to everyone as they walked:
“Many civilizations were built on the banks of rivers. Water is the source of life, so many countries have their own mother rivers. The Thames is Britain’s mother river, just like our two rivers and India’s Ganges. But everyone treats their ‘mother’ differently!” As a crosstalk performer, the tour guide doesn’t just say dry things recorded in books, he must have something that everyone can listen to.
Dong Qiang said, "Please tell me more details!"
"For example, we are now managing the Yellow River very well. The water in many areas along the river has become clear. This is the type of caring for the mother!"
"What about Britain?"
"British culture is basically on this river. The main buildings are on both sides of the river. Various churches that are more than a hundred years old or several hundred years old are on both sides of the river. We can see them now. This is like learning a skill and showing it to my mother!"
"What about Ah San?"
"Asan has a way of thinking about their mother river: I will never grow up in front of my mother!"
After hearing this, everyone became curious.
Dongqiang held the phone in his hand and asked subconsciously: "Why do you say that?"
"No matter how old he is, he always needs his parents to wipe his butt when he goes to the toilet!"
"Hahahahahaha!" Everyone in the tour group burst into laughter. This is the crosstalk artist, the art of language. It is much funnier than saying directly that they go to the toilet directly in the Ganges!
In addition, Qi Long also brought up his previous statement that Britain is actually Shaanxi Province, which also made the sisters in the tour group laugh out loud.
We strolled along the Thames, took a boat ride, took a photo with the London Eye from a distance, and then went to eat together.
The restaurant we ate at was not a British restaurant, because there were not many delicious dishes in Britain, so we went to a restaurant from a foreign country.
Local chicken dishes are a paradise for meat lovers. Combined with their local spices, people who eat them have a mouthful of oil and can't stop eating.
But barbecue is a bit more expensive, and Dongqiang was worried as he held his bank card.
"Yan Min, you said that for the welcoming banquet for the guests, can Qi Long be considered a guest? He is one of our own. Isn't this standard a bit high?" Dong Qiang discussed with the director.
Qi Long said with a straight face: "It's really not important what I eat, but the sisters have to eat well. The program team means to let the sisters have a good meal in my name. What's your name?"
"My name is Dongqiang."
"Hahahaha, your joke is too bad. I mean, don't shout. Isn't there a saying that the production team will pay for it?"
Yan Min stepped forward and said, "Indeed, today's meal is all paid for by the program crew."
Qi Long, Dong Qiang, and Yan Min said in unison: "But."
I knew that Yan Min could be so kind, all crosstalk actors are good people!
"But you can only order one dish at a time, and there is no English on the menu, only Chinese for chicken. You order one dish at a time until you get to the grilled lamb chops with red vegetables that the production team asked for. You can't use translation software."
In other words, if they are asked to order dishes blindly, and they cannot order this dish, they will keep eating other dishes.
"If you can't eat anymore, you can surrender. If you surrender, you lose half and pay half the price of this meal."
Of course, Yan Min’s program has a high degree of freedom, so they don’t have to play if they don’t want to.
Based on the principle of being here already, everyone decided to give it a try, but be cautious. If you have almost finished eating and still haven't ordered the designated dishes, you should surrender, so as to avoid the accumulated prices of the dishes being too high.
Qi Long suggested: "Tuji Country is the most famous for its barbecue, and it also has the most varieties of barbecue. If we order the most common words on the menu, it is likely to be barbecue. Then we can continue to order. If we confirm that a certain word is lamb, we are close to the correct answer!"
Teacher Lu Zhong nodded and said, "Well, this is a good idea!"
Her image as the queen is deeply rooted in people's hearts. When talking about business at this moment, she had a very serious expression. Even if she agreed with Qi Long's point of view, there was a sense of oppression!
Qi Long smiled flatteringly: "My emperor is wise!"
"Hahaha, hurry up and order, I'm hungry!" Aunt Xue urged.
Everyone started ordering. The plan was good, but reality slapped them in the face. The first dish had nothing to do with meat. It was a kind of flatbread, and it was sweet.
The older ones couldn't eat sweets, so they just had a taste. The solid pancakes were shared among Qi Long, Dong Qiang and Meng Ziyi.
Qi Long analyzed that the scones and the barbecue must be far apart on the menu, so he ordered a dish that was farther away, and then the scones and the salty ones came up.
Dong Qiang munched on some carbs helplessly: "You, someone with bad luck, shouldn't be asked to choose this kind of multiple choice question. You can get one of the two choices wrong. Don't order anymore, let us do it!"
This time it was Meng Ziyi's turn. The third dish was not a flatbread but grilled vegetables!
These four old sisters were big eaters and they finished their food quickly, while everyone was in a state of confusion as to whether to laugh or cry.
Well, it’s a meat lover’s paradise, a local chicken restaurant that specializes in barbecue. I ordered for a long time but I didn’t even see any meat!
Meng Ziyi was also excluded from the order. This time, the sisters ordered one dish, a roasted chicken leg. It can only be said that it was finally meat. Based on this roasted chicken leg, everyone determined the pronunciation of "chicken" in the local chicken language and ruled out a bunch of dishes on the menu.
But for a menu that features countless grilled meats, such exclusions are a drop in the bucket.
All tactics and strategies are nonsense. It is all a game of luck in the final analysis.
After a few more failures, everyone had already eaten several pieces of meat and the accompanying stewed or roasted vegetables, and had gone from chewing them in big mouthfuls at the beginning to taking a break after eating a bite.
Qi Long raised his hand: "Can I ask for help off-site? I don't even use my phone. Can you ask my assistant to use my phone to send a WeChat message to Chao Yue or Xun Ge and ask him to tell me a number?"
Yan Min thought this was also for the show effect and agreed.
Chao Yue was busy filming a sitcom and did not respond to the message.
However, Wang Xun, the European emperor in "Men Gang", replied: 6!
Qi Long looked at the number of members of the Men's Gang. There were only two words on the menu for dish number six. There was no word that looked like "grilled". He was confused. At this time, Dong Qiang made the decision: "This is it. Men's Gang is also Yan Min's show. Maybe he chose this dish on purpose!"
Soon, dish number six came up. It really had nothing to do with barbecue, but it was a soup: borscht!
This is a great help. One word is red vegetable and the other word is soup!
With these clues, finally, when it came to the eighth dish, they ordered the dishes specified by the program team and had a full meal for free. Not only were they full, they were even stuffed. Everyone ate so much that they sat there listlessly and didn't say a word.
To say it in the dialect of Tong County, the imperial capital: Eat nie!
(End of this chapter)
